Who Should/Will Win – The Razzie Awards

Oh the Razzies.  This is probably my favorite award show ever.  Every year, the Golden Raspberry Awards honor the worst of the worst in film.  Legendary films like Howard the Duke (1986), Showgirls (1995), Freddy Got Fingered (2001), and Jack & Jill (2011) have all won the coveted Razzie for Worst Movie of the Year.  So let’s take a look at this year’s nominations and I will take a guess as to who is going to take home the Golden Raspberry tonight.

I didn’t see all of these train wrecks, but ones I did, I pretty much hated, save for a couple.

 

WORST SCREEN COMBO

NOMINEES:

• FANT4STIC – Miles Teller, Michael B. Jordan, Kate Mara, Jamie Bell.
• MORTDECAI – Johnny Depp and his glued on mustache
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY – Jamie Dornan, Dakota Johnson
• PAUL BLART: MALL COP 2 – Kevin James and either his Segue OR his glued-on mustache.
• THE COBBLER – Adam Sandler and any pair of shoes.

+ You can see how serious this award show is when mustaches get two nomination.  I think the battle the whole night is going to be between Fifty Shades of Grey and Fant4stic.  Four is greater than two right?

WILL WIN – FANT4STIC

SHOULD WIN – FANT4STIC

 

WORST REMAKE, SEQUEL, OR RIP-OFF

NOMINEES

• ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: THE ROAD CHIP
• FANT4STIC
• HOT TUB TIME MACHINE 2
• THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE III (THE FINAL SEQUENCE)
• PAUL BLART: MALL COP 2

+ Hot Tub Time Machine 2 wasn’t terrible.  2 Paul 2 Blart made money and nobody remembers The Road Chip or The Human Centipede III.  Fan4stic it is and rightly so.

WILL WIN – FANT4STIC

SHOULD WIN – FANT4STIC

 

WORST SCREENPLAY 

NOMINEES

• FANT4STIC
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY
• JUPITER ASCENDING
• 2 PAUL 2 BLART
• PIXELS

+ I actually like Pixels, but then again, and I’m mildly ashamed to admit, I like most Adam Sandler movies.  Jupiter Ascending, while bad, is at least original.   Will it be a terrible adaptation of a classic comic or a terrible adaptation of a terrible novel?

WILL WIN – FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

SHOULD WIN – FANT4STIC

 

WORST DIRECTOR

• 2 PAUL 2 BLART – Andy Fickman
• THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE III (THE FINAL SEQUENCE) – Tom Six
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY – Sam Taylor – Johnson
• FANT4STIC – Josh Trank
• JUPITER ASCENDING – The Wachowski’s

+ Every other year, it would probably be Tom Six.  But, what Josh Trank did to Fant4stic was a landmark event in terrible filmmaking.

WILL WIN – FANT4STIC

SHOULD WIN – FANT4STIC

 

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS 

• ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: THE ROAD CHIP, THE WEDDING RINGER – Kaley Cuoco
• PAN – Rooney Mara
• PIXELS – Michelle Monaghan 
• SEVENTH SON – Julianne Moore
• LOVE THE COOPERS, PAN – Amanda Seyfried

+ Cuoco and Seyfried each gave two awful performances, which is powerful stuff.  But, Rooney Mara’s bland whitewashing was awful.

WILL WIN – ROONEY MARA in PAN

SHOULD WIN – ROONEY MARA in PAN

 

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR

NOMINEES

• HOT TUB TIME MACHINE 2, VACATION – Chevy Chase
• PIXELS, THE WEDDING RINGER – Josh Gad
• PIXELS – Kevin James
• ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: THE ROAD CHIP – Jason Lee
• JUPITER ASCENDING – Eddie Redmayne

+ I remember seeing Jupiter Ascending at Sundance 2015 and watching Eddie Redmayne was legendary.  He delivers an amazing line that should seal his win.  “I CREATE LIFE…and I destroy it.” Just typing it made me laugh.

WILL WIN – EDDIE REDMAYNE in JUPITER ASCENDING

SHOULD WIN – EDDIE REDMAYNE in JUPITER ASCENDING

 

WORST ACTRESS

• HOME SWEET HELL – Katherine Heigl
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY – Dakota Johnson
• JUPITER ASCENDING – Mila Kunis
• THE BOY NEXT DOOR – Jennifer Lopez
• MORTDECAI – Gwyneth Paltrow 

+ Jennifer Lopez and Mila Kunis were both atrocious in their films.  But Dakota Johnson’s mother, Melanie Griffith, is a Razzie legend, with seven nominations and two wins.  Like mother like daughter?

WILL WIN – DAKOTA JOHNSON in FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

SHOULD WIN – MILA KUNIS in JUPITER ASCENDING

 

WORST ACTOR

• MORTDECAI – Johnny Depp
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY – James Dornan
• 2 PAUL 2 BLART – Kevin James
• THE COBBLER, PIXELS – Adam Sandler
• JUPITER ASCENDING – Channing Tatum

+ Tatum’s wolf ears and air skates were hilarious.  James Dornan is a block of wood.  But I think Sandler will win, making him the most awarded Razzie recipient of all-time.

WILL WIN – ADAM SANDLER in THE COBBLER, PIXELS

SHOULD WIN – JAMES DORNAN in FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

 

WORST MOVIE

• FANT4STIC
• FIFTY SHADES OF GREY
• JUPITER ASCENDING
• 2 PAUL 2 BLART
• PIXELS

+ The big prize of the night is going to come down between Fant4stic and Fifty Shades of Grey.  The other three have at least a slight redeeming quality.  Fifty Shades of Grey is bad, but was it ever suppose to be good?  Fant4stic is from a legendary comic and had a great cast and it was horrible.

WILL WIN – FANT4STIC

SHOULD WIN – FANT4STIC

 

Who do you think will win the coveted Golden Raspberry at the 2016 Razzies?  Comment below or hit me up in Twitter @kevflix.  And don’t forget to like Kevflix on Facebook, by going to the page right here.

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