Review – Rings

Right from the opening scene I knew Rings was going to be bad.  It is a scene filled with horrible acting, terrible exposition, and no scares.  It was similar sipping on a terribly made drink.  The first sip is awful, yet you continue to power through it until it was over, even though it never got better.

Why this movie was made is beyond me.  The original Ring, made back in 2002, was a pleasant surprise.  It was a fresh, genuinely creepy film with some solid performances and had a really good box office.  All those combined, in Hollywood terms, warrant a sequel.  We got that sequel in 2004 with The Ring Two, which was a far departure from the original.  It was forced, boring, and didn’t have nearly the success of the original.  Series over, right?  After going 12 years without a Ring movie, it appeared so.  Welp, we were wrong.

I’ve bashed this recent Hollywood trend of making sequels to decade-plus old movies a number of times over the last year.  There is a slight justification to making a sequel to Zoolander (2001) or Bad Santa (2003), and that is that those original movies were good.  In the case of Rings, the film’s predecessor, The Ring Two, is not good.  Why make a sequel to a bad movie?  And not even a bad movie critically, but a bad movie financially too.  This made no sense to me at all.

But, we’re here, and the result is exactly how you’d expect.  Samara (Bonnie Morgan) is back and she is tearing shit up like she always does, coming out of T.V.’s, phones, and computers, and giving you the most awkward death face of all-time.  This time, Julia (Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz) sees certain visions that may lead her to why Samara is doing what she is doing, though I thought we already solved that issue in one or both of the other movies.

The movie itself is like Samara.  It moves weirdly and has a terrible pace.  It looks ugly and is a complete mess.   And, when it’s done with you, their is a look your face similar to that of her victims, except instead of being dead, we’re left asking, “Why the fuck did I watch that?”

Is it possible for Samara to come out of the movie screen and kill the studio and everyone involved for making this film?  That would be a movie I’d see and would be supremely more entertaining than anything in this garbage.  Throw this shit at the bottom of the well and never let it out again.

MY RATING – .5/4

Did you see Rings?  What did you think?  Comment below or hit me up on Twitter and Instagram, @kevflix, or on Facebook by searching Kevflix.